sighs.larre said sighing is a compliment to the devil. [ question mark??] it is rubbish la. n idun mean to offend him or wad but its immature to tink lidat. forgive me if i offend u in anyway.(tink he doesn read mine anyway?)
n i m so lksjdfhcx.dad took the modem.n im so..arhll.nvm.guess its for my good.n i din tok to mum n dad yest at all.cept for the necessary stuff.n im bloggin in chrch.so ya.wun get to touch my com at hm till dono when?
yay!! im happy! :) got 64 for my chi! i finaly passed with a B! after 10 long years.*pathetic face* its like.hai.thankew god.
dono.felt horrible yest n fri..mayb coz i was pmsing? or just feeling lousy.wel..told my self to press on for god. n i will never stop loving him till the day he stops loving me.coz he gave his son for me n he first loved me.so...i love u lord god jesus! =beams.
sniffs.
n i miss charlene lie suzhen sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much!
specially last nite.read her spas letta she wrote to me n i felt much better! hahas.love u dear girl. wish dat we can grow old tog.wif gini.hahas.shiok sia.may it b god's will den.hahas.cant imagine us being spas when we're old.our bones will crack! *ow!
hais.exams are in one weeks time.god bless me n al those who haf exams! may god grant u good memory n study smart! i ll remb to keep u guys in prayer! yay! -cheers.
love ya lots.
god steal my heart.

8:04 AM

my heart burns for you'
you see past all my lies.

whees.im drinkin nestle cereal oats.its nice.n im stuck onto it.been drinkin it the past few days.
i haf gone on fast fm yest to today.lunch dun eat.its so antagonizing ok..specially when gini was eating fries today.rite in front of my face.huh.the nice smell whifted up to my nose.oh gosh! how tempting it was.i drank soup..dats all.n i was sooooooooooo hungry i tell youu.n went for puppet.

my parents are seriously no help.they nv help me or enlighten me but make me feel worse.sigh.n larre says dat sighing is giving e devil a compliment.wad rubbish.was studyin like mad for bio n chi yest n sun.bio alot come out fm ten yr series.so i v hapi.but todays chi.hai.i tried gini's method of drinking essence of chicken to stay awake.it din help but i slept more.-grumps.niway.dono how i will do for this test but i hope i wun fail.n dis fri.is crazy!!
skool is fm 730 to 325!!! crazy la.got 2 hr long hcl paper one.den after dat still got lessons.liew.im so pissed.wad e.):

haiya.dad just nagged at me.im gettin irritated agn.im gonna seek you lord.dun turn away fm mi.please.n..i tink i ll be goin misions..coz i toked to darren.n he says dat he n kok guan can take ovr my roles.n i m relieved.but it has to be god's will.or i will feel guilty.

n i went mad in skool today.so mad.after chi test.so funi i tell you.i was screaming n screaming.wahaas.now reading a book i took fm gor's rm. "the case of faith"..seems interesting.tried toking to sirong bout jesus.n he said dat those r my beliefs.i will not be qi nei.i will cont to persevere n pray! n kenneth too.pray dat his parents will allow him to cum chrch.he needs spiritual growth.hmm..pq.i miss her.hai.alot of unsettled issues i haf to deal wif.but they r like so far.ackx.

dear lord.please be with me.i wanto noe u more.never leave my side.
praise ur name

10:52 PM

my heart burns for you'
you see past all my lies.

sighs
oh well.studied at starbucks with stef n tutor today.ya.
the constant thots of the choice.it comes n keeps coming.
i dono wad to do. msged gini n lene last nite wif gor's fone.was reali..haiya.n.. lets out another sigh.emotionally down? aiya.feel horrible.like not much care n stuff? -blanks
but lene cheered me up.dono.i receive her reply oni will smile.coz she is so bc! hahas..reali miss her.n gini gave me sorta more understanding.dat im emotionally drained now n e devil is attacking me.n dat i was depending on my own strength..n i shuld go to god n face him wif my probs instead.i noe all dis.n its just irrritating sumtimes.
u go in all directions n each time u end up banging the wall
n i noe i hafto answer them soon.n its...i dono.cried out to god last nite.so tired.mayb i ll go on fast to ask him.i dun care.i seriously wanto hear fm him.y cant he tell me directly? please dun run away..*catches the air
now tests..n i hafto push all dis thots aside.im scared of leaning on myself.n my thots r invading..rushing at me.reminds me of my song-drive me.the lyrics oso sumting lidat.mayb dis time i ll write another one.its during times like dis dat i write..weird laa.irritatng )fumes(
n i hafto save up to buy jo's present.i miss her.shes e only one dat actualli sees me n hugs me everytime.miss her hug.her bday.dis week eat less.ya.save.n go on fast.but must eat energy food.cannot fall sick now..aniway im sick.raas.sniffles.but i believe god will pull me thru.
-u will rite?
cof cof.
ohs.i will not wallow in self pity.dats horrible.but i will put my trust in you oh lord my god.
believing the unseen
trusting the unknown
knowing dat ure dere ur ominipresence

ok.its 8.hafta study.tmr bio test.n chi test on tues haven study yet.*shuckx.n suckx.so scared i ll do badly.


`dun turn ur back on me

7:44 PM

my heart burns for you'
you see past all my lies.

oh well.gor just say me dat i shuldn b using the com.ackx.
im so stuck.so confused.n once again im ... sighs. was prayin yest bout god s will? n today.i just knew dat e mission trip is gonna clash wif handprints.wow.
im like. wad the. hais.

pray bout it.darren told me n toked to mi.its like.most prob e trip is on 4-18.n handprints is 4 n 5..i wanna cry.my heart is set on e trip..but.ya.hafto seek god.reali hafto ask him.but like evrytime is ...not sure not sure? waad m i supp to do?
[ s p a c e d ]
n i dun wanto disappoint anione.but..hai.im torn. real torn.mayb im just makin a fuss.
it seems dark. will you. . .?
but all in all my actions must bring glory to god.n it must be his will.dats so impt.
hai.ok.betta stop.


`its foggy
`its dark
`its long
will you come. take my hand. lead me?

11:15 PM

my heart burns for you'
you see past all my lies.

wahaas.
i slept again today in skool..during eng..n i drooled on my hand..how yucky is dat!-red.n scrunches up face.
n durin assembly i blew my nose den everybody heard me n looked at me.lieww...how embarrassing la.*super red* ruuhs.n mr wang oso looked at me.*shuckx.was blowing n blowing my nose..den din go guides..felt sick.n lene..was naggin me dun go.n she din wan me to go..hahs..my faithful fairygodmother..n old woman.so i came hm n read my book den rest.feel e same..but better a lil.wahhaaas. n before i slpt..readin bk dat time dad n rach came hm..den he ask me y i cum back so early..den told him i sick he tell me tk medicine.den later he came in with e panadol cold n gimme water.im touched.realised dat..ya..touched la.n dono how to express it.den he said i liike baby.need to bring to you sumore..huh! im not k..bui wishd i was small once agn..n he wud carry me when i was tired.when small dat time we finsh cell late or wad or go out den cum back i tired..den he wud carry me up home..hahas..so fun.now...haiyuhs.im too heavy.n i wud just go to dad or mum n hug them or disturb them.(im noti.huhs!) now like..ruhhs.different? n dere's a gap.tink its my pride n theirs..but wad dad did has :)))))) whee.

n im glad!! nt week no more geog n ss!! wahaas.so much better.left bio on mon n chi on tues..though i rather ss or geog den chi.butt...its better now.yay! thankew god.

n i woke up late today. slpt early last nite lor.coz i felt terrible.den still wake up late.n i rushed down..den grabbed 2 slices of bread.ate quite alot today.haiya.sirong finally broughtr food.n both me n lene agreed dat hes gettin more bc.yhahas.ate his digestive biscuits.den reces ate rice.den ate kitkat. den came back ate chinchow.n i became kung!.wahaas.

gor is back.with mum..n i din quarrel wif rach today.bit oni.yay! haiya.mum say me.k.cumin la.ya..gonna study sumore..n read my bible..den sleep.im guai k.:)

praying for all those with exams out there! *sniflfes
n keep on trustin god n rest in his arms when ure weary.he loves all of you!!!

*grins n scootles away!

10:59 PM

my heart burns for you'
you see past all my lies.

hais.i woke up dis morn n felt so horrible! i had phlegm stuck in my throat n nose!! how horrible is dat.den i went skool i felt worse.stupid. cannot fall sick now sia.i will pray n rebuke e sickness..in fact i areadi did..n it seems betta.yay!

haiyo.last nite study lit.must give my thanks to mumi n lene n gini n sirong.todays lit test sucks! but i had their help in making some of e extra notes..thankew! haiyuh. no time to write lor e test..liew..we had 3 passages den came out one..come out to kill a mocking bird.ruhhs.n i had no time to finish writing e second qn.im so pissed.n was reading jane's bk in skool.lene was buggin me not to read coz it will make me solemn.no! its not true k! :p

aniway yest was quite an eventful day..played badminton during pe.n we were supp to run but we were like walking? ya.aniway.we played badminton outside e stadium..n sirong n gini n lene hit e 3 shuttlecocks we had: one onto e zinc roof..we tok a chair to get it, e other 2 on the roof of the aircon hall.liew.so funi la. n sirong whacked my arm!! super pain! my wrist n my arm..but partly my fault too..cos i try ti backhand e cock n it was more on his side..haiyuhs. now my arm is sore.ache. n den after skool.me lene n gini went dq..we were supp to be there at 330? n we walk super fast la.den aaron n jeff were there liao.hahas..we were late. den we ate ice cream!! n studied our lit.hahas. n i made a new discovery!!
im a KUNG! bushman!
wahaaaas..i was goin mad n makin lene n gini laf..e two guys were more conrolled.hahas..feel so spas la.n retarded. huhs! klfrsn,bv.dun care.n i reached hm n studied agn!

*burp.im eating apple.n its being oxidized.turning brown.yuck!! crunch.nvm.its still nice.

aniway.haiya.todya e test so sucky.dowan tink bout it.im gonna blog finish.check friendster den sleep.im tired.n im half sick.need god to replenish meeeeeeeeeeeee!! :)wahaas.
oh ya.still need to type e songs for cell wor dis sat.haiyuhs.nvm.do everyting as in doin for e lord! n i will do it joyfully!! yay! :)

n lene was so spas n funi today..doin all e weird stuff..humming durin class..den she became an octopus.hahas.*lafs

n studied at starbucks wif stef today.tutor join later.he pig la..go hm slp first..den did zuo wen.but din do much.cos i ran out of ideas in wad to write.tmr will go skool n cont.n i did maths! left 2 qn dono how to do..n still go amthas la!!

liew.nt week will be super stressed! mon:ss n bio (excretion n respiration) tues :chi..i must do v well for dis!! den thurs:geog.n fri is hcl paper one!! i super scared.my chi is like shit! lene n lurv were lafin today bout my zuo wen..alot of qns..n my phrasing sucks la i noe.haiyuhs.cannot.I MUST DO WELL!!! *SCREAMS*

`on the brink of _________

whooo...*sighs.so fast.time flies..

cant wait for cbtl..on e 14 nov.n mi n stef joinin after exams.yay.catch up on the steps n stuff..cos dey start prac durin our exams.

i just scratched my head.

haiya.got back my chem results dat day.so sucky..23/45.like i just passed? n it was easy.n can oni start tuition nt week..coz lin busy.i feel bad.like im botherin ppl round me? haiya.she say my maths quite good.just dat i careless.hmm.no..i dun understand n im careless. which totally sucks! hrrmmfjdgjgnnnnnnnvdb.hai.n its on sat morn.liew..i wanto sleep.dun be lazy la! hai.

dad just irritated me.so irritating.n im so broke.no money to eat oso. :(X.nvm.i bring bread tmr..or i seee e coin box got money not.owe lene 4 bucks.she help me pay for e stupid chi books for yue du bi sai agn.7.20..den she nedd to pay me 5 for e fever shirt.n i borrowed fm her 2 bucks today.sucks.-slap myself.cant say sucks.its not right.sori god.

r u n a w a y

9:54 PM

my heart burns for you'
you see past all my lies.

beautiful
all i am i give to you
with every breath i worship you
i pray, let ur will be done

i stand before you
my heart adores you
in ur hands i place my life
i pray, let ur will be done

let us see on earth
the glory of ur son
may i be the one
that u'd use in ur plan
bring the nations to ur side
let the kingdoms join in shouts of praise
may i be the one who brings
the one who brings ur love

hms.im so excited bout e end yr mission trip.tink it will be super fun!! hope..oh well.zips.nth in particular.mum, lene n gini shuld noe.hahs.no qns please.ya..hope dey wun split us sia..me ting n char..i will be.. depressed! if im separated.huh! n hope will be wif tutor.hahs.u will see the full power of my madness! wahahahahax.*grins.ha,n timmo..i cant imagine wad he will do there sia..singapore he so funi in china..-lafs. gay ah?

haiyuh.mum hid e old mouse n e new mouse.how pro la.i feel so pathetic.but shes sick.hai.im such a lousy daughter..-sighs.dono how to care for her? ruuuhs.n my skirt e ting came out.askd her to sew when i came back.well..she haven yet..nvm..i shall be an old grandmother n do it myself. n i din reali scold rach today.but im still not nice! *sighs ion exasperation.:(

aniway theres no bio test tmr..but nt week got 4 tests.crazy la.this thurs got lit test n she haven tell us wad to study.im so pissed wif the skool.still haven give us e exam timetable n it was pushed forward fm 17 oct to 7 oct..haf like oni 24 days left? my goodness.
-stressed
okies.nt week mon got ss n bio test.tues got chi test.i must study hard for dis.n thurs got erm..geog.crazy la.i feel so ruhh. im gloomy now.haiyuh. exam so near dey still give test.how to study? n i dono wad to study..like dono which more impt?
went to dq wif lene n gini today.studied abit.bio..finished my ch 10 notes..bout respiration.gonna cont wif excretion.cos mon test is resp. n excretion.hais.den did bit of geog notes just now.agriculture.liew.its boring la.n so dead.im learnin everyting fm scratch coz ms pat wong doesn teach properly?! -pissed.cools down.aniway.i must rely on god.i cannot rely on myself agn..i will die la.gonna do bit of emaths later..start revoising e first few chptrs.bet i forgot everyting? shuckx.

yay.aniway i look forward to tmr..after skool i go hm bathe den go chrch..teachin my dear jac maths n science.yups.i feel nice.hahs.n gonna do my chi compo den too.must rush hm..den got enuf time.handprints at nite.hmms..chi compo must remb to bring my dict.den bring chen yu study too.wed got ting xie on it.n den erm..bring lit too..hmms.hope mrs lai tmr will tell us test on wad.i feel like screaming at her.oni todya den noe got test on thurs.wa liew.-pulls hair.

ainway.i tink god is so cool.last nite..12 lidat..midnite la..i suddenly felt like msging serena..tell her to jia you n i love her n to tkaires.den she had exams today! so cool la.like god wanted me to encourage her! woohoo! n read psalm 133:1 in e daily walk bible.bout unity among brothers (in my case sisters) n i thot of my previous entry bout rach? im like..ok.god u r WOW!! i love you so much.so ppl:
GOD IS REAL!! N HE LOVES EACH N EVERYONE OF YOU SO MUCH!!
wahahas.givin my patrol oreo tmr..bought them in e aftn at watsons.feel kinda pathetic though.haiyuh.no money la.pui*n wrote to them to study hard n jia you.hope it will :)

wahaas.n lene got a new mp3..398 sia..but got 4.0gb..but quite big though.wells.i got my discman!! n meant to live n dare you to move is so nice!! ahhs.im stuck on it!
welcome to e planet..den sumting sumting existence..ahh!!*screams!
hahas.im not bimbo k.:)
okies..hafta go see friendster n check when cbtl is.
im so excited bout cbtl n mssions! ahh!!!! so exciting!! *grins
-hops away excitedly.or rather i bounce off.

9:53 PM

my heart burns for you'
you see past all my lies.

haiyuh.
this sucks. haf been tryin n tryin to get a new layout n othing happens..all koked up n got prob one.-frowns n sighs in exasperation.
aniway.
i feel so..blakluehrljan.i come hm..n then i just let words dat i dun reali mean to say slip.n they mk mum pissed n ...hai.i just farted aniway.haiya.im sori god...i wanto tk care of rach n stuff..n gor just went off when he just came back dis morn.back to camp again! but even if hes hm..i oso nv tok much to him. why m i so..anti at hm? n so ap..dad tried to tok to me i oso dowan to tok.hai.sucks.i hate dis way..like im nice outside..n at hm..im quiet n easily irritated.its so not good la.i must change my behaviour.god please help me.-pleads.i seriously need to change la.n its not e first time ive tried.
n ifeel like a pig now.just studied at bk with stef n tutor.den we were eating n eating..now im eating dinner.ohs ackx. n i seriously hafto buck up.specially maths. *screwams* dis term.i must study everyday.must commit myself to serious mugging.today din reali study much..but least got sumting done.yays.n i miss lene n gini.nv reali gone mad dis week.oni a few times..in chrch..hahas.ting said im always mad.im gonna go skool tmr n explode! woo hoo! hahs.
okies.betta stop laio..dono if e next cuming weeks can cum online.gonna do serious muggin. i say n say betta do sia.
okies to all havin exams..promos..prelims..do study hard n tkaires lots!! specially to mumi.tutor.lene.gini..ya n myself..hahas..n stef! u will not retain.trust god! -beams.
do rest n mug.hahs.contradictions.aiya.do ur best.n leave everytin to god!-hugs all n pounce off.

*dare u to run n meant to live stuck in my head.

8:00 PM

my heart burns for you'
you see past all my lies.

raas.
im back from the bbq.had fun! was bbquieng most of the food wif teri.yay! n we started e fire tog! thanks bryan for his fanning.though he wun read but oh wells.hahs.n ate..shuckx.feel like a pig.so full.aiyuh.must get rid of e fats! n auntie mabel was so funi..said u must tok to e charcoal..communicate wif it..hahas..rite..so funi n crap la she.
studied at esplanade lib today.haagan daz is sooo sooo ex! i was..wah.stun dio.8.90? n on e way hm ate mcflurry..hahs.1.95..wif oreo!! *sings e song.=) n ive decided to change my layout.hope it wud turn out nice.will try later.n help mumi add a tagboard,hahs.dono how will tings trn put but will try..hahas..

just bathed,feel clean now.hmms..was wondering..dono..n im so excited bout end yr! did i mention e stars tingy.tink i did.n im excited!! hahas..gonna learn how to play songs on e guit by heart. n memorise lyrics..n start praying harder..yup..gonna reali hafto connect wif god.i wan to noe him.noe his will for me at e end of e yr.n e yrs to cum.is he caling me to missions? or m i just? i must reach out to e ppl round me oso.dats challenging.thot of sirong n huiyuan n xue..n alot more..ya.lord please help me.let me noe ur will.clearly! i must seek him more.-sigh

n i dono la.i try to be there for them.try to give e help i can give.to do my best to be a good fren. wad do i get? i dono..m i a gd fren to them or not? or just one to sub in..taken for granted? i reali dono.n i dowan to tk part oin gossip..bout secrets here n there..dun tell dis perosn or dat person..kinda..-rolls eyes. bout it? just gonna please god. gossip isn wad he likes.n ya.i will just be there.tryin to help.to be a gd fren n stuff..in e end.i noe i stilll haf one bbest fren-jesus. always there n never leavin me.
-hugs him.
n yuck.my fingernails are long.hafto cut them.
okies..doin searchin for layouts now.prob goin chrch tmr in e aftn to study..
-grunts

11:21 PM

my heart burns for you'
you see past all my lies.

i m back!!
yay.feel better! was feelin bleh last last nite! n i asked god to go back to his right position.the inner disposition is e most impt! i ve learnt dat. n my heart is made for loving god n loving him only.i will giv my heart oni to u O LORD. i love u always. wad ever dat is not rite in my heart i pray u wud tk them away oh lord.
-beams
huh.n im goin to study maths later.gonna attempt.i noe god will help me. "i do my best. god will do the rest." yeah man! wanted to ask xue to study..but forgot she got SANA course.ruuhs.nvm..see if can study wif stef dey all..haiya.i ll just study by myself.wanto go DQ..eat blizzard n study.lufrehjmd,mndnvcbhfjks.sighs.okies.betta go bathe.goin for lunch wif family.den later cum back mayb study n den meet them..ya.
at nite got 101..still remb darren last nite so crap la..n i nearly exploded.felt like cryin.so much stuff..workshop e whole day..can cry sia.hahas..but ok now.ok byes.

1:11 PM

my heart burns for you'
you see past all my lies.

hais.dun feel like studying.
yay happy baday stef!!
mum took e mouse agn.wow.so i cant mk it big.rh.niway..had my first meal at nydc.hahs.nc eat there before.nice place..n e milkshake place is oso quite cool..e blueberry milkshake was nice. thanks ting.n lotsa thanks to ps kk for e treat at nydc.hes so nice. hahs. today was more on e church..more for leaders? dono la. but had points..feel like s***ing.

images are blurred so vague.wud u just fade away.dun come back.

imweirdlaraahs.kljhnb,arasaamugjiku8jmam.

shuld i study.reali dun feel like studying.
dad just told me to give e modem to mum.ok.fine.im off.

`raindrops are falling
`im stuck in e rain

9:29 PM

hais.dun feel like studying.
yay happy baday stef!!
mum took e mouse agn.wow.so i cant mk it big.rh.niway..had my first meal at nydc.hahs.nc eat there before.nice place..n e milkshake place is oso quite cool..e blueberry milkshake was nice. thanks ting.n lotsa thanks to ps kk for e treat at nydc.hes so nice. hahs. today was more on e church..more for leaders? dono la. but had points..feel like s***ing.

images are blurred so vague.wud u just fade away.dun come back.

imweirdlaraahs.kljhnb,arasaamugjiku8jmam.

shuld i study.reali dun feel like studying.
dad just told me to give e modem to mum.ok.fine.im off.

`raindrops are falling
`im stuck in e rain

9:29 PM

hais.dun feel like studying.
yay happy baday stef!!
mum took e mouse agn.wow.so i cant mk it big.rh.niway..had my first meal at nydc.hahs.nc eat there before.nice place..n e milkshake place is oso quite cool..e blueberry milkshake was nice. thanks ting.n lotsa thanks to ps kk for e treat at nydc.hes so nice. hahs. today was more on e church..more for leaders? dono la. but had points..feel like s***ing.

images are blurred so vague.wud u just fade away.dun come back.

imweirdlaraahs.kljhnb,arasaamugjiku8jmam.

shuld i study.reali dun feel like studying.
dad just told me to give e modem to mum.ok.fine.im off.

`raindrops are falling
`im stuck in e rain

9:29 PM

my heart burns for you'
you see past all my lies.

i will make disciples of all nations!! n they will be mad!!
disciplemaking is the process of bringing ppl into right relationship with god; and developing them to full maturity in Christ through transformational growth strategies, that they might multiply that process in others.

dad said yest..b4 gor left..bout growing in the fear of e lord.n i tink it is so right.today rev edmund chan oso.we must persevere to realise our vision. we must be obedient..following the lord in the direction he calls us to.fear the lord.our vision will be sweat n blood.dat we must be willing to sacrifice n give up all we have to follow god.we cannot compromise e vision god has given us.bit chiem..erm..we must have a sense of purpose n focus.so impt!
n then toked bout passion.our passion must be on jesus christ!!
he calls us to be with him.in him so we can be used by him.
and our whole focus is to disciple the nations!
the greatest thing is dat it is not only for those specially gifted or those v holy ppl but its for everyone!! arent we v priviledged? still we need smthg v impt!
total surrender
sigh.
learnt alot of tings today.still got alot to say but mostly these touched my heart.specially the last part.
he toked bout his daughter:
he played with daught.take her brain..den she ask "daddy daddy..gimme back my brain." den he asked "wads ur brain for? go ask mumi." den she ran to mummy n asked. "oh e brain is for tinking." den she told daddy n he restored her brain. den goes on wif e lungs, stomach (she knew it was for eating)den came e heart.
"the heart is for loving god!
den rev edmund chan went to his rm n cried.
i dono.i feel ashamed of myself.like..wow.a small girl says dat.im so touched.im gonna live my life agn for him.my every heartbeat beats for u lord jesus.den came another one.

his daughter gave her offering..cant remb..tink it was 2 pounds.daddy askd her: why dint u give e 5 pence? she looked at him as if he is mad.(so cute!) den he askd: y dint u give e fifty cents? she replies: jesus is the best! he deserves my best!so i gave him my pound!
im so..ok.a small girl says dat.im like.she can give her all..why cant i? im so sorry lord.dat i din give u my all in my amaths.in sum tings i do.im so so sorry.im gonna give everyting.my best to u fm now on.every test..whether i like it or not im gonna mug.study hard n do well for u.to give u my best.becos u are the best jesus!
do ur best. and god will do the rest.
and our very very first priority shuld b our intimacy wif god.
our very own inner being.relationship with god.
2nd our family.
im so ...hai..convicted.family.rachel is so irritating la.just now i bathe she rush into e toilet wash her hand tk her own sweet time.den splash water on me.liew.i tried hard not to scream at her.den just one min ago.she stand bside me in e study rm when i typin my blog n bump into me.so irritating.den play wif my mouse.she just used a book to try n whack my face.*sighs* middle child? real n authentic.hahs.not funny.but imust love her.she is my sis.i sigh.

den finish di tutor treated stef n i to starbucks caramel.thankew lots! haven had it in ages.n on e way to e mrt..one old lady ask me if i cud help her tk her tings while she went to e toilet.i was stuck..cos stef was late for her tennis? but i stopped aniway..wanted to ask stef n es go first..dono.was tinkin one train..this doesn happen by chance? its god's divine appointment.was tinkin mayb later in life i will meet her agn or smthg.n aniwya i stopped.she took super long.hahs.*im so so sorry stef dat i delayed u.sorry!* n tutor went to look for her.said wad if it was candid camera.liew.den she finally came back.n we rushed off.*sorry stef!* hoped she got there on time.n dat dey din get lost.hahas..god provides. hmm..divine appointment? or mayb just sum norm ting.dat it din mean aniting.i dono..let god lead e way.raas.aniway." ad u did to one of the least.u did it for me."

-stones.
i will not let my heart be taken by other loves.it will only be for u n u alone oh my god.oh jesus my king.i love u n i dance for u.how my soul rejoices.

9:41 PM

my heart burns for you'
you see past all my lies.

whoo!!!oh happy day!
wahaas.today is tutor's bday.
hap hap bday tutor!!
haas.like tutor like student> hahs.i shake my head.whoo.e nice ppl!
today was so fun!! n yest was a big success! though i din reali use my diaphragm which i was supp to.hee.haiya.i need to learn.
feel so..maloo? today was goin arn e whole chrch whining n asking ppl for money.'please donate.please please please please.' hahas..liew.*buries myself.oh wells.its for god n missions aniway! so thankew no one smacked me or aniting.im just too good at it huh? *grins.rahaas.so whiny.huh! aniways..hope we ll raise e most amt! it was so fun..goin arn..least i went mad n had fun..xin xin n char n jo followed me arn.hahahahahahaha...*shuckx.i feel mad!whoo-jumps arn spastically.
gor went back today.
oh.darren so funi..walk arn wif bags..den sellin at 1 dollar..den later was giving it.so desperate to get rid of it sia.haahs.
feel good.studies two hrs today.my bio.studied fm 4-5..slept..den wake up eat dinner study agn fm 8-9.yay! n here i m blogin! whoo hoo.
tmr IDMC.super early sia.must wake up 6..leave hse at 645..meet char at tanah merah 710 e first cabin.
oh ya!! lene n gini came yest.hahs.hoped dey had fun..dey felt bit out..oops.sori la.but still went mad..hahs.n i sang happy bday to you you you you..hahas..dono if anione noticed..hahas..oops.stef was covering my mouth.thankew god! i dono i feel like im so glad n thankful to him now.not exactly v happy..but im contented.
made dedication to everybody today!! hahas.im mad.planetshakers 'you r everyting' n i tell u it was so chaotic.hahas..youths were bombarding e place.tink v funi..hahas..so overwhelmin e youths.whoo!! we rock!wahaas.had fun! hahs.whoo hoo!
i love you guys!! mummy! lene! gini! everybody!!!!
-hops hops hops

9:10 PM

my heart burns for you'
you see past all my lies.

whoohoo.im back.
hahs.seems like oni one day but like so long.ohwells.yest jammin was fun.

huh! i must master e art of singing fm my diaphragm.its irritating.(izit spelled correctly?ackx)jeff was teaching me.say 'cradle.wrong.cradle.wrong.cradle.'haiyuh.i was so irritated.but i must persevere on.use e correct method to sing.den i go off sumtimes.hah.so funi.

went swimmin b4 dat at lene's hse.so fun sia.as usual i went mad n made alot of noise.*grinx.when we still in skool..i laf alot sia.liew.jennifer was makin me laf.n i found out dat u laf everyday for 15 min.6 mths u will get 6 pac.whoos.im gonna laf everyday. hahas.ure right.hee.lene went so spastic.she nearly fell off the canteen bench n hahs.e look on her face is priceless i tell u.so funi la.i burst out lafn.den gini was drinkin her vitasoy..den she ran to e basin n spit it out.i laf even more lor.so pain.den we finally went her hse.den we went swimming! hahas.i lafed alot oso.compass heights.her condo.den after dat got neighbour come down n discuss e dusty issue wif lene's mum.dono got wad renovation den dey say wanto complain coz v dusty.ohh.e lunch was v nice.her mum cooked asam fish n rendang n veg.n keropok.whoo.pok pok pok.hee.

im drinkin ginko barley dessert.later gotta go chrch.whoo.today is e big day! ymc3 anniversary.cof!!!!yay! -jump for joy! rahaas.hope i wun zhao xia.please god.oh read finish 'the discrete charm of charlie monk'.wa..nice..v nice.alopt of twist n turn sia e story.i want to say alot of tings but forgot.oh ya.

i got back result slip.hais.not v gd.but im quite hapi.coz i improved my L1R5 by one mark! hahs.now 15 points. but v surprised..my chem n combined humans( ss n lit) got A2.haiyuh.disappointed wif bio.shuld get A1 but coz of dat stupid test got A2.huh.i must work harder.hai.amaths.suckz la.40...got E8.how terrible is dat? let dad see..den dis morn.mum n dad in car..tok tok tok.ask me to ask lin to ask her wad her schedule is.fm now til exam haf 10 sessions of 2 hr long tuition.i wanna cry.den say i always not busy.still wan to get involved in so many tings.i v involved meh? wa lao.hope she can mk it in wed.coz thurs n tues keep free for handprints.mon..haiya.dono.may haf cbtl training..mayb mae it mon 5-7?den after den rush to chrch.ya..coz she mon no skool.

went joggin dis morn.at bedok reservoir.so slpy i tell u.i wake up.jog til v tired.n i eat lunch half bowl rice.now eating ginko barley.juz now munched abit of indian food.n erm..wad else..chinchow.shuddap la mother.hen mang hen mang.wah lao.rach disturb me agn.*frowns.

go away.dad just nagged.chat n chat n chat.go net n meet for appointment wif ppl on e net n kena rape.wah lao.i not stupid lor.i dun go chatrooms aniway.please lor.ruuhs.-calm..yes.i noe u love me.ok..i will get ready now.bye la.

-hops off

1:36 PM

my heart burns for you'
you see past all my lies.

listenin to cof now..hahs.muffled.
woah.amths test got 1/20..hahas.sori tutor.=x..why m i not sad?-shrugs. coz i noe im destined to fail amaths for e rest of my pathtic life.n i noe im not supp to tink lidat but.sigh.chi aint v gd too..C6..53i tink..hai.sirong was relax..i noe.i wun cry bout it.mayb oni later at nite.wells..told gini n lene bout my decision.i must do it.i cant say n dun tk it seriously.-sigh-n iwun care.

just baked cookies.cheryl askd me to bake today.came back den was oh.ok..feel like baking.n e mixer was spoilt.i burnt e engine e other time i use it.mum was so pissed.i was oops.but din say aniting.say nt time dun let me use aniting.haiya.n i shouted at rach agn.irritating..why did i shout at her.hai.must control.

today chem test ok..hope will do well..was easier den first one..please god..let me do well..study last nite til 1+..almost 2..den i drank coffee round 10 plus..n had diff slpin..my eyes were tired n pain n i was in bed..tryin to slp.irritating.aniway thank god i woke up early today.tmr paper one..compo..go skool early learn e format.ya.n ask god for ideas n inspiration to write narrative.den after dat goin lene hse n swim..yay!! den we jam at nite..gonna relax myself..den e nt wk mug n chiong di.-sigh-

rach cryin now.how nice.it makes everyone irritated..soon mum will start sayin.*bingo.caron koh.qu clear ni de mess ey.caronkoh.yes mum.i will.-go clear.

done.im back.im hot sia.later must do my 100 sit-ups.sigh.gettin fatter.how irritating.yet im still exercising n eating moderately.huh!-groans-raas.
mum just said off it now.off it now.haiya.ya lah.

-grumps.y do i feel lost? yet ok? no..cant use lost..hmm..dono? feel weird? huh.jaded? hais.aniways.

iloveyougod.i will smile for you.

8:43 PM

my heart burns for you'
you see past all my lies.

-blank-
so sianded..now juz treating everyting as nothing.
yest nite typin blog.den mum came out screaming.and blar blar blar.had a long day yest.went skool.so slack n stupid..a waste of time..den watched movie-bourne supremacy.it rocks! wif lene n gini.den took neoprint.found out dat i dun look gd in fotos.-sigh- den meet darren to go buy stuff.alot of tings sia bras basah.den go puppet.come hm kana scold lor.wads new?
den ya..the same old tings.even say i tell them lies..wad can i say?i dun care animore..why shuld i?

im gonna mug.mug like nv before.specially my maths.other time devotion in skool.said to do everyting for e lord n not for men.i will.im gonna do everyting for him.its gonna b diff but i dun care.oni god cares aniway.

n wadeza my heart feels.im gonna shut them up.dun care animore..aniway matt damon rocks! he is not suai but he so rocks..super cool n stoned n bc and charismatic.

gonna go buy cloth for anniversary later.den go chrch study wif stef.den prac fm 6-8.ya.gor is back.rach took alot of my tings.i dun care.wad can i do.gonna lock my door wheneva i go out fm now on.they dun care.oni say n say.ask me to change.

i dun care wad they say about me
its all rite its all rite
i dun care wad they tink about me
its all rite theyll get it one day

coz i love u
ill follow u
you are my my life
i will read my bible n pray
i will follow u all day

i dun care wad it costs animore
coz u gave it all n i ll follow
i dun care wad it tks animore
no matter wad happens i m goin ur way

coz i love u
ill follow u
you are my my life
i will read my bible n pray
i will follow u all day

all day all day now all day

anione arn me cud see how gd uve been to me
all my frens who dono u
i pray that u might save them too

yea.i dun care!!

12:32 PM

my heart burns for you'
you see past all my lies.

shout it out (:

-

all the brothers and sisters

-

of old.

-

credits.

-

wonderful people

-